Eureka!
I was sitting in the lobby yesterday night when Dylan came down from his room with Laura. Now, the moment I realized it was them two, my stomach got all gross and queasy and I looked away immediately. Dylan saw me though and said, "Hi T____!" I said hi back and continued reading. As soon as they left, however, I started to wonder WHY I felt so...dare I say it...JEALOUS when I saw Dylan and Laura together. I mean, I have no feelings for him in that way; he's my best friend and I'm not romantically interested in him at all. This confusion plagued my thoughts for another hour before I finally said Screw it! I can't concentrate on the history of the theatre when this is nagging at the back of my mind! So, I grabbed my Bible and my prayer journal and went to the prayer chapel to write and read and pray for a while. I was there for about 20 minutes and then came back. As I was walking back, the reason for my feelings hit me; I kept forgetting that there was another woman! Let me explain:
Laura doesn't go to our school. She goes to one about 2 hours away, which means that she's not here very often. When Laura isn't here (which is 99% of the time), it's "Dylan-and-T____"; we are eachother's best friend on campus and he's the "significant other" in my life. I'm so used to him belonging to me and me belonging to him that when Laura shows up, it's like a slap in the face and someone yelling, "HEY! THERE'S ANOTHER GIRL IN THE WORLD CLOSER TO HIM THAT YOU ARE!" and that's a shock, hence me feeling jealous. I know I shouldn't...I mean, she has every right to be closer to Dylan than I am. She's his GIRLFRIEND for crying out loud! And she was in his life first. It's just something that I'm gonna have to work on with God to help me "share" Dylan without getting all huffy about it. I sent him an email asking him where I stand in his life and if he sees me as any different than all the other girl friends he has. I'm kinda nervous about his answer and his reaction to the question, but it needed to be asked...I really need to know...
Laura doesn't go to our school. She goes to one about 2 hours away, which means that she's not here very often. When Laura isn't here (which is 99% of the time), it's "Dylan-and-T____"; we are eachother's best friend on campus and he's the "significant other" in my life. I'm so used to him belonging to me and me belonging to him that when Laura shows up, it's like a slap in the face and someone yelling, "HEY! THERE'S ANOTHER GIRL IN THE WORLD CLOSER TO HIM THAT YOU ARE!" and that's a shock, hence me feeling jealous. I know I shouldn't...I mean, she has every right to be closer to Dylan than I am. She's his GIRLFRIEND for crying out loud! And she was in his life first. It's just something that I'm gonna have to work on with God to help me "share" Dylan without getting all huffy about it. I sent him an email asking him where I stand in his life and if he sees me as any different than all the other girl friends he has. I'm kinda nervous about his answer and his reaction to the question, but it needed to be asked...I really need to know...
posted by Temair at 9:46 AM
1 Comments:
hey what kind of irish music do you like. I just found some old recordings of boys of the lough. if you want some of the live sets I have let me know. that is if you like Irish fiddle stuff.
jeremy
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