I have no flipping idea

Wow. It's been a rather hectic past month, and I'm not sure which direction my head is facing.

About 1 week before I got back from my JA trip, I found out that Jordan wouldn't be able to come and get me from the airport/stay in Newberg for a few days like we had planned. I was crushed, needless to say, especially because we didn't know when he would be able to come down and visit. Lexie ended up picking me up, and after 2 days of job-hunting in Newberg (to no avail) and sitting around Joz's house doing nothing, Jordan told me that his parents had offered to buy me a train ticket up to Lynden to stay with them for a few days and see Jordan! And that is where I currently am...Sitting in the recliner in their family room with his sisters, waiting for him to get back from swimming at the Y. But oh, the tale has not ended. Faaaar from it.

I'm actually not supposed to be here right now. I had planned on going back to Newberg this morning, but after spending almost an entire evening in tears, dreading leaving and not knowing when I was going to see J again, we decided that since I would just be sitting around Jocelynn's house not doing anything and being miserable, I might as well sit around here and avoid the miserable part all together (or postpone it for a while, anyways). And there has been a new development! I might not be living in Newberg this summer after all! Jordan and I are both total and utter wimps and neither of us can stomach the thought that we might not be able to see each other again before school starts, so there is a distinct possibility that I will be staying with his great-aunt or grandparents (or somewhere in Lynden) and working/living here instead! This would make life much easier on the both of us who would rather not spend the next 3 months perpetually sad and weepy. This is still a very new idea and we haven't actually made any moves to make it happen, but it's a possibility. There are ups and downs to this though; if I move up to Washington, I will be away from everyone from school. EVERYone. Now, I've done this before (I did it freshman year when I went home for the summer), but at least I was home. Once Jordan starts work, I won't see him pretty much at all with the exception of a few random days off and quick hello and good-byes in between his shifts. I'm pretty sure he's worth it though :0)

So, that's the scoop. It's all very up in the air and undecided and I would appreciate prayers cause you can never have too many of those. We have some big decisions to make this summer about both of our futures. Not to mention I'm going to be a senior this year (holy crap!). Yeah...Wow. Prayer is a good thing :0)